miniconcert 2009...and the aftermath.

sound makes or breaks a gig. just proved that theory tonight.

the sound was rather bad, with feedback and loud screeching noises occasionally. marcus was trying his best, let's give him the credit he deserves, but still, it was bad. at least the first half was. the MCs (me included) had to come up with random fillers to prevent the audience from going to sleep while the band prepared itself. mostly it was xianyou and wang qian doing the random talking, while me and grace just stoned.=.=

feel quite bad. especially later when kee onn and judson came to speak to me and wang qian on the principles of hosting. hmm. lots to improve on. maybe the effort from me just wasn't there tonight. was disturbed by the very bad sound system and couldn't find my energy to engage the audience. well. never mind. it was a sombering experience=X.

my song was fine, for once, throughout the whole night, there was no feedback from the speakers. though i couldn't really hear myself on stage, i was told by seniors that my voice kinda overpowered kaili's and they couldn't really hear kaili's voice. kinda apologetic. i was surprised by my own 'relaxness' before the song. no nerves, just tiredness. and i thought i did justice to the song=)

after the whole thing ended (with xianyou prancing around on stage like a crazed man; it was good mind you. meant it in a good way, though both their voices cracked. LOL. super hilarious. crack at the same note summore=.=), they called for a debrief, and said a whole lot of things expected for a debrief. 'you all did well','but can improve','thank you all for the effort','i thought it was good' etc etc. to be honest, to be a good leader, after every concert/performance/recital, you have to say that to your groupmates because they did put in the effort to do well.

whether it is truly that way remains to be seen. sometimes, results not equals effort.

and i'm program head for emerge 2010. means more busy, busy stuff to do. luckily ben's program head too, so i suppose we share the workload?=P haha.

till emerge next year=)

myeverything.

Everything---王力宏

Cause You're My Everything
就一个原因
让我勇敢面对这个世界
想给你Everything
不管用多少个明天
永远从此刻开始算起

你的爱是我的Everything...

=)

the dilemma

today was a good day in general, for reasons that some people will know why=P.

thought quite abit today...

i realise, as i got older, the driving force pushing me to succeed changed. when i was in sec sch and jc, i wanted to do well for my parents, for my future, for my lofty ambitions to be a doctor. when i first entered uni, i told myself, i'll do well for my parents, and ultimately, for myself.

And now, i tell myself, i'll do my best for my parents, myself...and for you =).

for you are one of my driving forces now=)
------------------------------------------------------

i've never believed in allowing problems to disappear by itself. because problems tend to get more severe if left untreated. this time, it's not me not wanting to solve the problem. it's because someone's holding me back, telling me to wait awhile longer, maybe he'll think it through and decide that it's not worth it.

given the choice i would have approached the person in question long ago and thrashed things out, face to face, man to man. but i haven't. because, he's my good friend. i don't wanna hurt him, because i know it's not his fault. i know, because i've seen too many examples, and i know it's hard to extricate yourself from everything.

but you have to try.

no matter how painful it may be. trust me: short pain better than long pain =X

i still extend my hand of friendship to him, should he decide to take it. i really hope he takes it, cause he's been a good fren, and i really don't want this to compromise our friendship.

but some things still have to be done, a necessary evil =X. be it for me, for her or for him...it eventually, has to be done...

walk on...

251009 the turning point=)

went for tuition and voices today. was quite tired at the end coz i was hosting the whole show and had to keep talking. after that wasn't nervous for my own song at all. and i don't think i sang the song very well. partially coz of the band, partially coz of the sound system, partially becoz i didn't feel fully confident. heck. singing is about being happy=)

of coz that's not the point of this entry.

i'll remember today forever. 251009. i've not felt so happy and exhilarated in a long long while. As i waited with bated breath for her reply, i wondered if this could be it. the beginning of something new. the beginning of something, which i feel, might be for a lifetime.

I'm glad that you trust me so much. Be assured I trust you the same way, and even more, if that's possible. The future's uncertain, but i'm sure we can walk on together, sharing each others' burdens, worries, unhappiness, happiness, joy...

there was a period where i thought i couldn't trust anyone anymore. but you brought me back to where i am now. thank you, mydearangel. i really appreciate it.=)

for you brighten my life, like nobody can...

P.S.: As i read and reread what you sent me, another wave of happiness came crashing over. It mattered alot to me. Really(: I told you i don't remember what i did for you because i did it from the bottom of my heart, because i simply thought it was the right thing to do. And i'm glad i did what i did=).